Big night in baseball this week. Jayson Werth of the Philadelphia Phillies did something only 49 players have accomplished since World War II. He passed a urine test.
Actually Werth stole second, third and home all in one inning. Only the vendors selling $10 beers were doing more stealing.
I was surfing around online last night and I saw some amazing video of a suitcase getting sucked into a jet engine. I kind of miss the days when the airlines ruined your luggage by hand.
General Mills is in trouble with the FDA for the health claims it's making about Cheerios. I guess they did go to far. I looked at the box. It is a questionable claim. It says "Cheerios can lower Dick Cheney's cholesterol 4% in six weeks."
Former eBay CEO Meg Whitman is running for Governor of California. She says she's going to run the state like a business. I thought we had been running the state like a business. I mean, California is just as broke as GM, AIG and Chrysler.
Apparently, Manny Ramirez of the Los Angeles Dodgers was using drug a female fertility drug. They gave him a 50 suspension after he failed a pelvic exam.
A female fertility drug enhances athletic performance? Who knew? I guess that explains why the Octomom is now batting cleanup for the Padres.
The price of a postage stamp as gone up to 44 cents. It's part of a government program to make it too expensive for terrorists to use mail bombs.
Dick Cheney has been on TV more than Oprah. In fact, they're just going to give him his own TV show: "American Asshole."
You know, Simon Cowell is going to leave "American Idol." They're gonna need a new jerk. Why not give the slot to Cheney? I mean the show is torturing millions of viewers every week.
I guess the the government is going to release some CIA memos revealing that waterboarding didn't reveal any useable confessions. Here's the best piece of information they got: Osama Bin Laden's nickname is Osama-Rama.
Maine is now the fifth state to legalize gay marriage. I knew something was up when I saw the cover of the new L.L. Bean Catalogue: a shirtless stud fly fishing in leather waders.
Now if you're gay, here's some fact about Maine. One: gay marriage is now legal. Two: even the cute guys all smell like Lobster tail.
